I was shocked when I read the job description from a post-abortive ministry which outlined – “We are looking for women who can be a first responders to post abortive people who call our helpline number. You must be post abortive in order to serve in this capacity…”
The requirement that, “You must be post-abortive,” astounded me. Nothing rattles me more than when abortion recovery programs openly DISCRIMINATE and REJECT God’s anointed people simply because they have never experienced abortion.
As a direct result of this cliquish rule, abortion recovery efforts have diminished over the years versus increased because there simply are not enough healed post-abortive people to administer these programs nationwide.
Post-abortion experienced-based discrimination often resides in the false mindsets that if you’ve not experienced this choice, you cannot understand this pain. Consider the comparison to other aspects of life to show the irrationality of that theory:
- A veterinarian has never been an animal. Does that mean they can’t help animals?
- Male OB/GYN’s have never experienced childbirth. Are they, therefore, precluded from delivering babies?
- Pastors have not experienced all forms of sin. Are they only allowed to counsel about the sins they have endured?
I often welcome non-post-abortive people during Ramah’s training events by saying, “Never be ashamed of not having an abortion! It’s a good thing to not have this credential!”
This comment is initially met with laughter. Then hands go up and testimonies reveal personal experiences of rejection from abortion recovery ministry efforts due to a lack of direct experience with abortion.
Many that receive my invitation to join our ranks in ministering to abortion’s wounded hearts are then released to pursue the calling that God had long ago laid on their hearts. The issue then becomes finding a ministry opportunity where they are accepted and put to work. Most end up starting something new and we are always happy to help!
The involvement of non-post-abortive people is essential in abortion recovery efforts because they provide a window to the Christian community that offers abortion’s wounded hearts love without judgment.
When I met the non-post-abortive leader in my healing class in 1992, I was overwhelmed at the depth of her understanding of my pain. She knew my emotions better than I did at that point! I trusted her, leaned on her and still have a friendship with her today. God used her to change my life!
God gives His people various talents and experiences that allow them to mesh perfectly with abortion’s wounded hearts. Healthy credentials for this work include a mix of some following job skills:
Grief Background – Most of us have experienced grief in some form. When you lose a loved one, grief becomes a natural part of your life. Abortion recovery programs are simply bible studies based on grief.
Pregnancy Loss – If you have experienced miscarriage, stillbirth or any other form of child loss, you can easily understand a great deal about abortion’s grief and shame. The heartbreak of losing a child is a common denominator.
Secondary Abortion Trauma – When someone close to you aborts, you can become post-abortive at a secondary level. Many then experience sub-levels of abortion pain – grief, anger, shame, etc. Grandparents, siblings, friends or relatives of the post-abortive person or the aborted child can feel abortion pain as well. This connection is particularly qualifying in ministry when it is combined with love and compassion.
Direct Abortion Involvement – Those who might have encouraged/participated in an abortion decision, and then found God’s healing, can be very effective in abortion recovery ministry efforts.
Understanding Sin’s Consequences – The emotions of shame, guilt, anger, forgiveness, bitterness and resentment relate to many sin issues. Everyone that has been saved has been forgiven. God considers one sin the same as another. It is only human beings that place weights on various sins.
Bible Study Leadership Experience –If you have administered a Bible study in the past, your background would be wonderful in the abortion recovery arena. Godly principles of sin and redemption are obviously translatable to abortion pain.
Spiritual Stability – Non-post-abortive workers are often more stable and have a calming influence on post-abortive hearts, particularly when emotions are running high. The enemy simply cannot push buttons in the same way because you have never had an abortion! This makes you a highly effective group leader!
Considering that there have been over 55 million abortions in the US alone since 1973, it’s easy to compare the post-abortive population to the situation described in Matthew 9:35-38 (NIV):
Jesus went through all the towns and villages, teaching in their synagogues, preaching the good news of the kingdom and healing every disease and sickness. When he saw the crowds, he had compassion on them, because they were harassed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd. Then he said to his disciples, “The harvest is plentiful but the workers are few. Ask the Lord of the harvest, therefore, to send out workers into his harvest field.
With only a small amount of abortion recovery ministry efforts occurring around our world, the post-abortive are certainly harassed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd. There are tens of millions of us currently residing on Earth. If God is calling you to help us, will you accept the position?
Please take the time to search your heart and carefully consider whether you can commit to working with abortion’s wounded hearts. I promise that your compassionate heart will be put to good use and that God will continue to bless your efforts.
A good place to begin ministry efforts is with a general discussion of abortion’s emotional pain whenever possible. Whenever you are discussing abortion, realize that post-abortive people may be listening.
Please address us directly by offering compassion with this simple statement that Dr. James Dobson spoke to reach my own heart – I know that I’m talking to many people who may have chosen abortion. I want you to know that there is no sin that God cannot forgive. The problem may be you don’t forgive yourself and need some help. We are here to help!
The peace that surrounded me when Dr. Dobson spoke those words remain in my heart today. He was the first recognized Christian leader to speak to me directly as a post-abortive person, showing me the truth of God’s amazing capacity to forgive.
Bottom line: The abortion recovery movement cannot afford to turn away anyone God has led to this work and who has been trained for this ministry. We need your help!
A good first step is to read my book, Her Choice to Heal: Finding Spiritual and Emotional Peace After Abortion, and have it handy just in case someone talks to you about a past abortion. It was designed to help them understand their regret and move ahead towards receiving more peace in the future.
To learn more about the emotional recovery from a past abortion, visit our online site at Her Choice to Heal. This site is designed to help individuals understand the emotions of healing as well as many other general issues post-abortive people experience.