Many of us who have been raised in traumatic circumstances have a hard time understanding the nature of love.  When someone says, “God is love,” we think, “What does that mean?”  I spent a great deal of my life fearing God, particularly so after my abortion.  When I read the following passage from I John 4:17-19, I realized this fear was wrong:

Love has been perfected among us in this; that we may have boldness in the day of judgment; because as He is, so are we in this world.  There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment.  But he who fears has not been made perfect in love.  We love Him because He first loved us.

That passage helped me to see that there is no fear in love.  I hadn’t been “perfected” by God’s love until I could accept the love God gave me by sending His own Son to earth to die for my sins. My abortion recovery class leader said, “If your abortion was the only sin on earth, God still would have sent Jesus to die on the cross . . .” It’s hard to comprehend love like that because we don’t understand the nature of God’s love.

In First Corinthians 13, Paul talks about God’s love as “agape” – the kind that is based on the intentional decision of the one who loves rather than the worthiness of the one who is loved.

Part of my misunderstanding of God’s love was that I never felt worthy of it.  But God doesn’t care how I feel – He loves me anyway.  God’s form of love is written in the I Corinthians 13 passage so be sure to look it up.  Keep these facts in mind:

  • God’s love is faithful all the time and never proud or rude.
  • God’s love doesn’t envy and won’t boast.
  • God’s love can’t be angered and never thinks evil thoughts about you.
  • God’s love doesn’t rejoice in evil or injustice but loves the truth.
  • God’s love bears, believes, endures and hopes in ALL things.
  • God’s love cannot fail you — ever.

Here are some obvious Biblical truths:

  • When you are/were angry at God, He wasn’t angered with you.
  • When you surrendered the care of your unborn child(ren), His love for you endured.
  • If we fell into sin (promiscuity, drug abuse, etc.), He believed in us and knew that we were hurting. His love waited for us.
  • God’s love waited until we were able to bear the thought of our sins and turn to Him for help.
  • His love watched over us during our time in sin and protected us in spite of our choices.
  • God didn’t care that we rejected Him.  He wasn’t leaving us no matter what we did to push Him away.
  • God’s love didn’t care if we felt worthy because He made us to be worthy.

There has never been a moment in our existence that we were ever able to earn God’s love because He gave it to us when He conceived us in our mother’s wombs.

It’s hard to understand that kind of love because there are so few examples on earth.  That’s because our world is full of humans.  God isn’t human and doesn’t love that way.  But He wants us to learn to love others in this same way.  It is the most important part of healing, to understand God’s loving nature.

Perhaps you can’t comprehend God’s love right now.  That’s okay.  God loves you enough to help you understand this devotion.  He will be patient, gentle and kind with you.  He will stand beside you as you cry or are angry with Him.  There is nothing you can say or do that will turn Him away from loving you.

You may as well just get used to the idea that He’s going to teach you about His love in a way that few can comprehend.  Why are you so special?  I don’t know.  I’m not God.

He doesn’t expect us to understand.  Take time to think about this perfect love and allow yourself to have a seed of hope that in believing in God, you will quickly discover the love you’ve been searching for in the places of religious assembly.  First Corinthians 13:13 says, And now abide faith, hope, love, these three; but the greatest of these is love. 

God loves you, my friend.  He truly does.  Ask Him to help you know this love in your heart.  If you don’t feel anything, don’t panic.  He’s there.  It just may take Him a while to break down the walls of your heart to let His love shine in!

 

 

Abortion Recovery Blog Sydna Masse

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