“George Tiller performed my abortion,” the caller revealed. “My husband and I went back to his clinic later that year for his yearly memorial service. We thought it would be comforting but it was horrifying. There was no memorial – just a long tirade of how we were “right” to have chosen abortion.”
The horrifying trigger of simply revisiting the place where you allowed a child to die can be debilitating, particularly if you are returning for a subsequent abortion. To think that it would be healing to return to a place where such a death was experienced is ludicrous.
Rarely is recollecting a past abortion an easy effort. Certainly, someone lost in denial, working to prove to themselves that abortion had been a good choice, could attend such an abortionist’s event. But why would they want to? What good can come from returning to the scene of where a child died and visibly connecting yourself as someone who used the services of an abortion clinic?
The caller ended this story saying they left before the end of this service and spent the following days in deep grief. We talked about healing, God’s forgiveness and how this abortion had impacted her physically, spiritual and emotionally. It was a blessing to refer her to a healthy abortion recovery program in her area that provided even more healing to her broken heart.
Another woman shared with me that the abortion clinic gave her a plaster cast featuring the footprints of her aborted child before she left. When she looked at this “abortion keepsake,” she was immediately faced with the reality that she had not aborted a blob of tissue but a fully-developed tiny human being. It didn’t take her long to search and find our ministry website.
Pro-choice efforts to comfort those who may be upset after their abortion typically has only one goal – to reinforce that their abortion had been a GOOD choice. Their agenda is to also use these women to promote abortion, even in their obvious grief. Since many women repeat their abortion choice, they use the ruse of abortion recovery to ensure their services are profited by any future unexpected pregnancy situations.
Even in my blogs, I refuse to link to abortion recovery programs that are offered by pro-choice groups. We also do not refer to overt pro-life groups if their abortion recovery efforts are not solid and healthy. Too many on either side of this political spectrum have the agenda to get women talking publicly but rarely help them heal first.
Our ministry never refers to abortion recovery programs if they lack a healthy grip on abortion pain and healing. But pro-choice abortion recovery groups certainly exist online and steer many women into confusion as to the source of their internal angst.
Here is an example of one pro-choice website’s recommendations for those in pain after abortion – Another possibility is to call the clinic where you had your abortion and ask if there is a counselor available.
Since when do abortion clinics, who profit by inflicting torturous abortion procedures that take the lives of tiny humans, serve as emotional counselors to their victims? Abortion can be an incredibly traumatic physical, psychological, spiritual and emotional experience. If women had a harrowing time in an abortion clinic, why would they ever return to the scene of this violence for counseling?
Another ruse of pro-choice after abortion counseling outlines a typical mission – “… to support the nation’s trailblazing abortion storytellers of today by giving them a larger public platform to make their cultural mark. We’ll engage the pro-voice allies in our families, communities, the media and Hollywood to give women who have had abortions the support, respect and accurate portrayal in movies and on television that they deserve.”
The portrayal of post-abortive woman through Hollywood channels will always support the pro-choice agenda. Their desire to “normalize” an abortion experience follows along with their mindset that abortion is ultimately good for women. Nothing could be further from the truth. What obviously is missing from this mission statement is helping a woman process the myriad emotions after abortion.
I was one of the very first women to admit to an abortion in the public arena when my testimony was aired on the Focus on the Family radio show in 1992 with Dr. James Dobson. I personally know the spiritual warfare that was ignited in my life many months before this taped program was aired.
Thankfully, by that point, I had received incredible healing from a local pregnancy center’s abortion recovery class. I knew that there were millions of women living with deep shame, grief and guilt over their choice to abort. Somehow God wanted to use me to reach abortion’s wounded hearts with the hope of His healing.
My decision to go public impacted my family. My mother never embraced my ministry effort as she perceived I was telling the world she was a bad mother. I sacrificed our relationship to follow God’s clear call to help other post-abortive women find His healing. Thankfully, God took care of my mother and reunited our hearts before she passed away.
Many women who seek out pro-choice counseling after abortion are searching for affirmation that their abortion was a good decision. These hearts vocalize that abortion was a good choice while their body language and tear-stained faces speak otherwise. The few that are proud of their abortion decisions come across as brutal and heartless, reinforcing stereotypes of post-abortion dysfunction.
After my abortion, I vowed never to return to an abortion clinic due to the intense pain I experienced by having an abortion without benefit of any anesthesia to my uterus. I determined to be a faithful birth control user but was forced to visit Planned Parenthood for my prescriptions. I moved three times before I was married, visiting Planned Parenthood in each state.
Each Planned Parenthood office required that I attend training on birth control usage. While I listened intently, most of the women in the room were ignoring their information. Incredulously, I asked a few to keep it quiet as I wanted to learn as much as possible.
At the end of each presentation I attended, there was a discussion of what we should do if the birth control failed. The option of continuing a pregnancy was never discussed. Instead, each office outlined their abortion services. Paying for these classes was the only way to ensure you could receive a birth control prescription. Clearly they had an agenda in their service model. How could we trust them with wounded hearts?
Here are some things that women should look for in searching for help after abortion:
Does the program’s website feature pro-choice or pro-life ideology? Either extreme can be geared towards political versus healing efforts. If there is a partisan presence on a group’s website, they likely would not be well trained in post-abortion comfort.
Are there testimonies of other women on the program’s website that outline the depth of healing women received because of attending the abortion recovery class? It’s okay to check a program’s references from those who have attended the program. Since an abortion secret is difficult to share publicly, few programs feature verifiable testimonies. Therefore, it’s important to make contact and ask to speak to someone who can outline the positive results of their healing effort.
If you or someone you know has experienced abortion, the Her Choice to Heal online abortion recovery program is the perfect venue to begin a healing journey. This free-to-use website is backed by our team of trusted and experienced leaders who can help individuals process their pain free of any political agendas. We can also assist you with a reference to a healthy local abortion recovery program as well.